Coming out of the preverbial furry closet?

[Makaze]

So this ain't dire, despite what the title be saying, but the roomie say me on TFP last night(joined via friends list, not that I mind) and later that night, maybe around 1am came by my room a look of well curiosity I'd say more than shock and asked if I was one of "them". This puts me in a odd position since I generally tend to keep furry and my rl separate due to well standard assumption about us as furries by the media and what not.

I ask if anyone knows of a good way to start these explanations off in a hope to educate my friend of some time on furry, to prevent assumptions and what not. As most of you know I'm kinda bad with crap like this and usually come off as more hostile/defensive than I mean to be. Any aid is as usual appreciated

[Stormcaller3801]

I'd say your best bet would be to first ask him to explain what he means by 'them.' Then if he says 'furries,' get him to define the term. That should tell you pretty quickly what his opinion of furries happens to be, and how well his definition applies to you. From there, you'll likely have a good idea of how the rest of the conversation is going to go as well. I'd definitely and clearly state any points that do not apply, particularly if they're negatives, make sure to directly acknowledge any points in his definition that are both true and happen to be neutral in tone, and if you think it'd do any good, explain the divide between your offline life and furrydom.

The end result is unknown, but it breaks down this way: if your roommate is already dead set that anyone who's furry must be some deranged pervert that's polluting the gene pool, he's not going to change his mind about it regardless of what you say. If your roommate's got something other than cement between his ears, he'll probably decide you're not one of 'them' (being whatever nightmarish idea he has in his head) and accept that you're normal enough to drop it into the wastebin of conversations long gone, or he'll just accept it and move on.

The same issue comes up with any group that people know very little about save for the worst rumors. Doesn't matter if that's furry, religion, gaming, or what have you. The key is to basically carve away all the worst parts, acknowledge the relatively mundane, and leave the individual convinced that, yeah, it's different, but it's not that big of a deal.

Of course, sprays of furry porn in TF2 probably don't help this, but I find that sort of thing is best dealt with the same way you would if you were playing Halo and your mom walked in to see someone teabagging your corpse, or notice that another player's icon is a crudely drawn cock and balls. Shrug it off as immaturity inherent in the genre, and move on.

It's also worth noting that there's a heck of a lot of stuff that people are willing to accept so long as they don't have to deal with it. If your roommate spends the next couple weeks discovering that his life hasn't changed, he's probably going to ignore the whole thing.

[Makaze]

[Stormcaller3801]

I think the best way to deal with the sprays is just to point out that they're not tremendously different from the rest of the Internet, and online gaming in particular. Pornographic sprays, both those intended to be attractive (take your pick of any of the thousands of animated bouncing boob sprays) and those intended to be repulsive (goatse), are out there without furry ever being involved. This is the same culture that provided the world with 4chan, after all. The only difference is that these sprays incorporate anthropomorphic animals as well.

And as for the idea of not being on the defensive, I agree. But it's also very important to know what he thinks furry is, rather than just guess. Otherwise you'll end up defending yourself against charges that have never been brought against you in the first place. That's a waste of time, and it'll make him think that furry is all those things you're defending against. Sort of like if Luxembourg went to the UN and made a sudden announcement that they are not conducting any sort of nuclear weapons research, and any suggestions to the contrary are unfounded. People would immediately start suspecting that they might be conducting such research.

[Sekh765]

Just say.. "Yea." and move on. Thats pretty much how my roommate and I's conversation went. Going into some long drawn out conversation about what is and isn't furry with someone who isn't one is both creepy and awkward for that particular person. Just say yes like its nothing and move on, dragging it out will just result in the situations your probably hoping to avoid.

[Kyle]

What if your roommate is also a closet furry, which is why he's interested in the first place! Perhaps you should leave some furotica out one day, or have him find you reading it and see if he recognizes it!

[Makaze]

[Sekh765]

*claims victory*

*plants flag*

[Makaze]

[Fiskie]

Heh, out of the people I've told I'm a furry, 2 knew what a furry was and didn't really care about it much.

One was a regular nerd and the other was a manga artist. She only lives down the road from me and I think I need to coax art lessons from her somehow.

Well.. they both seemed to know what a furry really was. I showed aforesaid artist some of Naylor's Furworks comic and she was impressed by it.